Keeping Sight of the Goal

"Therefore we also, since we are surrounded by so great a cloud of witnesses, let us lay aside every weight, and the sin which so easily ensnares us, and let us run with endurance the race that is set before us, looking unto Jesus, the author and finisher of our faith, who for the joy that was set before Him endured the cross, despising the shame, and has sat down at the right hand of the throne of God." Hebrews 12:1-2

"Do you not know that those who run in a race all run, but one receives the prize? Run in such a way that you may obtain it. And everyone who competes for the prize is temperate in all things. Now they do it to obtain a perishable crown, but we for an imperishable crown." 1 Corinthians 9:24-25

"Therefore we also pray always for you that our God would count you worthy of this calling, and fulfill all the good pleasure of His goodness and the work of faith with power, that the name of our Lord Jesus Christ may be glorified in you, and you in Him, according to the grace of our God and the Lord Jesus Christ." 2 Thessalonians 1:11-12

"Question 1: What is the chief and highest end of man?

Answer: Man's chief and highest end is to glorify God, and fully to enjoy him forever." The Westminster Larger Catechism

"But seek ye first the kingdom of God, and his righteousness; and all these things shall be added unto you." Matthew 6:33

Today I would like to remind all of us what the goal is that we are working towards.

It's not getting married. It's not to have children one day. It's not to be organized, or anything like that

Our goal is to seek first the kingdom of God and His righteousness. To glorify God with our lives. To have a godly Character that Jesus Christ can shine through to others in our life.

All of the other things that "shall be added unto you" are just 'icing on the cake' so to speak. Certainly they are worthy things to hope for and work towards, but when our eyes are focused on God we do not have room for the discontentment and discouragement that can come over us when we are too focused on the OUR hopes, OUR dreams, OUR goals.
Now I'm not saying that all of the things that I've written on this blog are not important... I believe that they are, but they are just a step towards glorifying Him, they are not the goal.
And as we do seek first the kingdom of God and His righteousness, all of the other things really will be added to us. God is the one who gives us the fruit of the Spirit, so let's remember to keep our eyes on Him and our lives focused on glorifying Him.

Crushes on Unavailable Men

"I know this sounds REALLY bad but what if the guy you have a crush on is married and was someone you once dated. What if you ask God to take the feelings away and they still don't go away???? Please help!!!

Worried,
Anonymous"

Dear Anonymous,
I know that it's easy to get freaked out when you have strong feelings and they just won't 'go away'. Believe it or not, at one point in time most young ladies will have a crush on someone who is unavailable. Whether he's courting, engaged, or married to someone else, it is hard to deal with feelings for someone that you know you shouldn't be having feelings for. Dating aggravates this problem as it encourages you to form attachments to people that, odds are, you won't spend the rest of your life with.
But the principles are the same no matter the situation or the circumstances.
Now, here are a few ideas for you, ok?

1. Whenever you get a thought about him, or warm fuzzies about him, or anything, pray. And don't just pray about him, because that will just continue to train your brain to think about him. Try something like this. "Lord, I know that So-and-so is married, but I still have a crush on him. Please take away those feelings and help me to reserve my heart for my future husband. I pray that You would prepare me to be a good wife someday, and help me to practice guarding my heart now in preparation for the day that I am married myself. I also pray for my grandma, please heal her arthritis because it is so hard on her not to be able to walk around. Please give me wisdom of how I can bless her and make things easier on her. Thank you, in Jesus' name I pray. Amen."

2. "Take every thought captive and make it obedient unto Christ." Don't allow yourself to daydream or anything. Here is one way that you can 'take every thought captive'. Picture your mind as an airport, and the thoughs as airplanes that are trying to land. When one comes zooming up that you don't want in your mind, send it off. For the first week (or probably month) you will probably have to do this over 100 times a day, but it does get easier and less frequent when you practice.

Well my dear, I hope that is helpful to you. Keep reading your Bible and training your mind to think of things the way Jesus would want you to. And don't worry about your crush too much, as long as you continue to pray about it, I'm sure that God will help you with it so gradually that you won't even notice it's gone. :-)

*hugs*
Joy

PTGW Part Eight B: Taking Care of Your Soul

Note: Thank you to everyone who commented! It is good to know that people read this blog because I was thinking of not continuing it, but I'm glad that I am going to continue writing for this blog because I think it helps me more than anyone else. ;-)

Alright, today I'm going to be talking about taking care of your soul, though maybe not in the way that you're thinking.
Now first of all, what is a soul? Well, I'm NOT going to go into what the Greek and Hebrew words mean, because this is not that kind of a blog. (If you want to find out, you could probably just google it.) But if we look at the Bible, we see that the word soul used in a variety of ways (Just get out your concordance and look up the word soul). But most often it seems to be used to convey the core of our being.
Now, God is the only One who can save our soul, but after He redeems us, how can we take care of our soul?
Well, a great part of that is what we do, see, watch, listen to etc. Because even though we have a soul, heart, mind, body... we are still just one person and everything affects each other.
I don't know about you, but I can tell when I'm not taking care of my soul, mind, and heart because I start feeling 'cluttered', anxious, and disturbed.
So what can we do to upkeep that part of us?

1. Pray. Prayer is amazing. We are able to speak to God and He hears us! (One particularly helpful verse on prayer is Philippians 4:6-7 "Be anxious for nothing, but in everything by prayer and supplication, with thanksgiving, let your requests be made known to God; and the peace of God, which surpasses all understanding, will guard your hearts and minds through Christ Jesus.") And make sure that you really do pray specifically about what is bothering you and then give it to Jesus and LEAVE IT WITH HIM!!! Don't take it back. And if you start worrying about it again, pray again and give it to Him again. Praying scripture is a great help (e.g. "Lord, please help me to think about whatever is true, whatever is noble, whatever is right....")

2. Read your Bible everyday. I like to read mine in the morning first thing, and last thing before bed. Pray that the Holy Spirit would show you what needs to change in your heart every time before you read and when He shows you, repent of it and confess it to God. This can remove a lot of that cluttered feeling. The more you read your Bible, the more it will train your mind to see everything in the light of the scripture.

3. Sing scripture songs (that actually use Scripture) and hymns. I love the Hide 'em in Your Heart songs for scripture songs. As for hymns, I'm not talking about 'worship songs'. I'm talking about good, old fashioned hymns. Even though his theology was a bit off, a lot of Charles Wesley's hymns are really wonderful. One of my favorites is "And Can it be That I Should Gain" (I like to sing that while I'm washing dishes... just because it's hard to sing while you're breathless from vacuuming). :-)

Ok, now are you ready for a little list of don'ts?

4. Don't spend too much time watching movies. They just add to the clutteredness, and they can really make you feel disturbed and anxious.

5. Don't spend too much time listening to secular music. (Now I'm not saying that you can't ever listen to secular music, but make sure that you limit the time you devote to it.)

6. Don't read romance novels. These sow discontentment and most teach you that the outward appearance is all that matters (that goes for romance movies too).

Now, one thing that I would like to challenge you to do is a fast. This is a mind and heart fast to get you out of the cluttered state and into a peaceful one. Here is what the fast looks like:
For one week you give up entertainment (this includes movies, YouTube videos, and books), secular music, video games, and thoughts that are not glorifying to Jesus (for instance, hateful thoughts, lusting thoughts, and coveting thoughts).
Ok? So now you've removed those things from your life, something has to take their place, right? Of course right! ;-)
So what is going to take their place? Prayer, Bible reading, and hymns. Read your Bible first thing in the morning, right before bed (about a chapter each time), and then whenever you would normally read a book go ahead and read your Bible. Pray in the morning when you read your Bible (Just to let you know, you don't have to do this alone, if you have little kids you can read your Bible outloud and pray with them), at night before bed, whenever you have a thought that is not glorifying to Jesus, and whenever the rest of your family is watching a movie or something use that time for prayer as well. Instead of listening to secular music while you work or just to kill time, sing hymns and scripture songs. I don't know about you, but I'd much rather hear "And Can It Be" than "Man, I Feel Like a Woman". ;-)
At the beginning of the week pray and ask God to show you areas in your life that are not submitted to Him or are against His word, and when He shows you focus on praying about those things throughout the week.
When you pray don't just pray for yourself, make sure that you pray for others as well.

Now of course, you can modify this fast to fit your needs. The first time I did it I also did a sugar fast because I wanted to make sure that I didn't turn to food when i was bored. The second time I did it, I only did a movie fast and I allowed myself to listen to secular music if I wanted to (though that time didn't have the same effect as when I did the whole fast because I still had entertainment). But you can also do an internet fast, a dessert fast, etc.

If you do it, make sure to come and let me know how it went for you. :-)

Now obviously, no matter what we do God is the One who "restores my soul". So during the fast pray that He would restore your soul.

To end with here is Psalm 23.
"The LORD is my shepherd;
I shall not want.
He makes me to lie down in green pastures;
He leads me beside the still waters.
He restores my soul;
He leads me in the paths of righteousness
For His name’s sake.

Yea, though I walk through the valley of the shadow of death,
I will fear no evil;
For You are with me;
Your rod and Your staff, they comfort me.

You prepare a table before me in the presence of my enemies;
You anoint my head with oil;
My cup runs over.
Surely goodness and mercy shall follow me
All the days of my life;
And I will dwell in the house of the LORD
Forever."

PTGW Part Eight A: Taking Care of Your Body

Don't give up on this post after just reading the title! I know that most of the time it is very discouraging to read anything about taking care of your body, whether it be losing weight or skin care or makeup or whatever. But I'm not going to present some impossible idea of how to change your appearance. Rather I'd like to give you a few realistic ideas of how to take care of your body.

Taking care of your body and your appearance is very important; it is part of being a good witness for Jesus Christ. That doesn't mean that you should spend three hours a day on your appearance, but it does mean that you should remember that even though God looks at your heart, people will see your appearance first. (But the LORD said to Samuel, “Do not look at his appearance or at his physical stature, because I have refused him. For the LORD does not see as man sees; for man looks at the outward appearance, but the LORD looks at the heart." 1 Samuel 16:7 - yes, I know it's out of context, but it's still true)
God can work through everyone no matter how they look or smell or whatever, but if my dad gave me a beautiful dress to wear and I wore it every day and didn't wash it and it got all grey and dirty and I told everyone that my Dad had given it to me, well... that wouldn't make them think very well of my Dad, would it? "Oh my goodness! I'm sure glad I'm not his daughter! Look at what she wears... she doesn't even look clean!"
We should be so proud of being God's daughters that we want to give Him a 'good name' by looking like what we are... taken care of and loved very very much.

Also, when you get married your husband is going to want to be proud of your appearance. So start on good habits now so that when you get married you'll have a head start.

Now here are a few things that I'm NOT saying.

1. I'm NOT saying that you should lose weight

2. I'm NOT saying that you have to wear makeup

3. I'm NOT saying that you should obsess about how you look and constantly be running to the mirror

4. I'm NOT saying that you need to be self conscious if your clothes aren't brand-new

Ok? Now that we've gotten that straightened out... here are a few ideas of how to take care of your body.

1. Stay clean. This means taking a shower when you need it. Some people can get away with one a week and some people need one a day. A good way to tell if you need one is if you don't smell fresh or your hair feels stiff and greasy. Simply staying clean is an excellent place to start on having a good appearance.

2. Get dressed in the morning. Don't go to the grocery store in your pjs and slippers. Aside from modesty issues, is life as a Christian really so depressing that you can't bear to get ready for the day???

3. Do your hair. I know, it's basic, but it's important to have your hair look neat and tidy. Now I can't brush my hair when it's dry because it's so curly that it would just frizz and I'd end up looking something like Ronald MacDonald. ;-) But on days that I don't get my hair wet, I still smooth it and put it up in a bun.

4. Drink water. Drinking water can help you to have nice skin, give you energy, and help you not to smell bad when you 'perspire'.

5. Go for a walk or a bikeride OUTSIDE every day if you can. It doesn't have to be long, I like walking a quarter mile most days. This will get your blood flowing nicely, give you a chance to be peaceful (no listening to music), and help you be more energetic.

6. Make sure that your clothes are always clean, patched, and wrinkle-free. It doesn't matter if your clothes aren't new, you can look just as nice in 2nd (or 3rd or 4th) hand clothes as in brand-new clothes as long as they are pressed and clean.

7. Take care of your teeth. Now I'm not saying that you need to get braces, teeth whiteners, etc. But if you take care of your teeth (brushing and flossing every day) your teeth will look nice and you won't have to worry as much about bad breath.

8. Practice good posture. Stand up straight! You are proud of your Father, now walk like it!

9. Wear a Smile! That is a very important thing that you can do for your appearance. If you have a smile it won't matter if your teeth are crooked, your clothes old, or your hair is frizzy! Smiling is a very easy and simple way to look pretty and bless people.

10. Dress like a Lady. (I assume that no men are reading this, but if they are they should dress like Gentlemen, not Ladies.) ;-) Don't look as if you are ashamed of your gender. It is so refreshing to see a woman who isn't hiding under baggy pants and t-shirts and yet is not flaunting her body in mini-skirts and tight shirts.

11. Do the things that God tells us to in His Word. This is THE MOST important thing of all. If you live a clean life through Jesus, than others will have a 'good feeling' about you. I don't know why, but that seems to be the way it works. :-)

Now if you want to you can do other things like put on a little bit of makeup etc. But the most important thing is to be clean and neat, and to smile.
I don't know about you, but when I see someone who doesn't really take care of themselves I think "Oh dear, they must be quite unhappy with their life."
As Christians, we have been blessed with a Father who cares for us no matter what happens. Let's show the world how much we appreciate Him by taking care of His temple (our bodies).

"Or do you not know that your body is the temple of the Holy Spirit who is in you, whom you have from God, and you are not your own? For you were bought at a price; therefore glorify God in your body and in your spirit, which are God’s." 1 Corinthians 6:19-20

Next time I'll be talking about taking care of your soul (which is infinitely more important than your body). As usual, I love getting comments (as long as they're polite). I have no idea if anyone reads my posts unless they comment.

PTGW Part Seven: Learning to Encourage

Encouragement is so important, isn't it? It's amazing what a difference an encouraging word can make in someone's life. And it doesn't always have to be words, I know that there have been different people who have encouraged me with something as simple as a hug or a smile.
One of my favorite "Hide 'Em in Your Heart" songs is based on 1 Thessalonians 5:11 NIV ("Therefore encourage one another and build each other up, just as in fact you are doing").
But encouraging someone isn't always as simple as smiling at them, is it? Sometimes it means getting out of our comfort zone and risking rejection or embarrassment (even though not many people reject encouragement, we can sometimes still feel like they will). Unfortunately, I don't know any way of getting over the awkward feeling of stepping out of our comfort zones except to do it over and over. I have to confess that I'm not very good at this, but "practice makes perfect", and I'm going to give you a few ideas on how to 'practice' starting with the least awkward. :-)

1. Smile at people! You might be amazed at how attractive and uplifting a smile is. If you've ever smiled at someone and not had them respond, you know that it's always a bit of a let down when you don't get a smile back. I've had bad days where I went to the store and a total stranger smiled at me and it really did make my day better. :-)

2. Serve people. Now I'm not necessarily talking about painting someone's house or doing their laundry. Simply getting someone a glass of water or helping them cut up vegetables for lunch can encourage them.

3. Give a hug! A hug is a very efficient and simple way to encourage someone without words. Sometimes you might find that someone gets tears in their eyes when you hug them and, assuming that you weren't just squeezing them too hard, that's a sure sign that they really needed that hug. (Now, obviously there are people that you wouldn't feel comfortable hugging, and that's fine. You should never hug anyone that you feel creeped out by, and probably you would only want to hug your friends and family anyways.)

4. Write a note or send an e-card to someone telling them that you are glad that you are friends (or sisters, or cousins, or whatever), and say something that you specifically like about them. (i.e. "Dear Martha, I am so glad that we are friends. Your patience with the little children really challenges and encourages me to be more patient. Thank you so much for your example! Love, Joy" ~ of course you're supposed to insert your friend's name and your name in the place of "Martha" and Joy! ~)

5. Listen to them. Simply listening can make a huge difference to someone and be very encouraging.

6. Tell someone something that you like about them ("I love the way you reply to letters so quickly").

7. Encourage them in the area that they really need it. This can be a little more tricky because, unless they have specifically confided in you, they might feel as though you are picking on them instead of encouraging them. Even if they have confided in you, sometimes this idea backfires and they get upset so use at your own discretion.

When you are a wife, you will be your husband's main encourager and 'cheerleader' (can anyone think of a better word than 'cheerleader'?), so if you can practice encouraging and cheering on your family, friends, ect. now, you will have a head start on knowing how to do it when you get married.
There are many ways that you can encourage people, and some of them are as simple as doing the job your Mom asked you to the FIRST time she asks. Use your imagination and encourage people in your everyday life. (On a side note, did you know that simply living a Christian life can encourage others?)

PTGW Part Six: Learning to Follow a Routine

After a very long break due to sickness, I am excited to finally be continuing my "Preparing to be a Good Wife" posts.
Today we will be talking about learning to follow a routine. Now I'm not talking about following your Mom's routine, although it is important that you work around her routine, I'm talking more about making sure that your day is not wasted because you never know what you are supposed to be doing. This may not be a problem for some of you (isn't it wonderful how God made everyone different?), but hopefully it'll be helpful anyways.

When we are younger it is not as important to have our own routine, is it? We get up, eat breakfast, do school work, have lunch, more school, free time, supper, family time, bed. And that's basically what each day looks like. But when we have 'graduated' it's a little harder to arrange our time.
Of course, in some ways it is easier because it's more up to us, but somehow it just seemed less complicated when we knew that we had to do math at 9:00, history at 10:00 etc. Now suddenly you don't have a set thing that you have to do at 9:00, instead you have a list of what you need to accomplish during the day.
Now I don't know about you, but it was not helpful for me to have a list of things to do without a set time or order to do them in. Sure, I would get things done, but when I was cleaning the livingroom I'd be remembering the laundry, when I was doing the laundry I'd be worried that I'd forget to make bread, when I was making bread... (You get the idea!)
It is hard to be peaceful and to enjoy life when you're frantically trying not to forget something.
Here are a few ideas of how to get your day in order.

1. Make a list of basic things you want to accomplish each day, and include even the simplest things. (e.g. Breakfast, Get dressed, Pick up room, Lunch...)

2. Next make another list of things that only have to be done every other day (perhaps washing your hair or working out).

3. Then make a list of the work things that have to be done each day (vacuuming, washing dishes, laundry, etc).

4. Next make a list of things that you would like to have time for. Things like sewing, writing, e-mailing, and reading.

5. Now make a chart. It's a little hard to explain so I'll show you an example one. It's kind of a rough draft that I made. :-)

~~~~~~Monday ~~ Tuesday ~~ Wednesday ~~ Thursday ~~ Friday
Breakfast
Shower
Get Dressed
Room Clean Up – 5 Min
Exercise – 45 Min
Course work – 1 Hour
Music – 30 Min
Social – 30 Min
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Science (With Kids)
Bible Study (With Mom)
Lunch
Home Improvement
Supper Prep
Supper

*Monday – Weight Lift Arms ~ Course Project Work ~ Piano ~ E-mails ~ Sewing
Tuesday – Weight Lift Legs ~ Course Book Work ~ Guitar ~ Blogs ~ Topical Bible Study
Wednesday – Weight Lift Arms ~ Course Forum ~ Piano ~ Stand-Up-Girl ~ Cooking
Thursday– Weight Lift Legs ~ Course Project ~ Guitar ~ Letters ~ Topical Bible Study

* The reason I have a list down here is so that I know which particular thing belonging to the general category of, let's say, social time, I'm supposed to do. On Monday my social time involves e-mails, on Tuesday it involves blogs, on Wednesday the forum that I volunteer on, on Thursday letters. Friday is our family day, so I do not have it listed.

Now obviously, your routine, or schedule, is going to look different from mine. Perhaps you'd like to have times listed instead of the number of minutes. (e.g. 9:00 - 9:30 instead of 30 minutes.) Because my day is very much centered around what my family has to do, I use this routine as kind of a guideline and I do not put down exact times because if my sister makes us breakfast and it isn't done until 10:00, I'm still not behind because while she is making it I can get ready for the day without feeling like my whole day is going to be messed up.

I like to have little boxes under each day and across from each task so that I can check them off when I'm done. It gives me a chance to see what I've accomplished and makes sure that I don't waste my day or forget something that I have to do. Since I only use it as a guide line, I can insert other activities (such as gardening) whenever I want, or I can do it instead of working on my Nutrition course.

Learning to follow a routine can help you to be peaceful, to have a sense of accomplishment, and to get more things done without feeling frazzled. If you can learn how to use your time wisely and efficiently now, it will be an invaluable skill when you are a wife and a mother. :-)

One Lovely Blog Award

Thank you so much to Mrs. Dixon (who has a lovely blog herself) at http://trainingdaughtersteachingwives.com for the One Lovely Blog Award!

I just love this graphic... the teacup is so pretty!

Here are the rules:
1) Accept the award, post it on your blog together with the name of the person who has granted the award, and his or her blog link.
2) Pass the award to 15 other blogs that you’ve newly discovered. Remember to contact the bloggers to let them know they have been chosen for this award.

Ok, well, I don't know if I can come up with 15 newly discovered blogs, so I'll just pick a few.*

Amanda at amandabethonline.blogspot.com - I love her fun fashion reviews and suggestions

Miss Amy and Miss Olivia Joy at http://teatimewithamy.blogspot.com/ - Even though they only update once in a while, their blog is a pleasure to read and to look at and they have some really neat ideas and recipes for Tea

HannahBeth at www.homeschoolblogger.com/maideninwaiting - I enjoyed seeing her entries for AmandaBeth's fashion week, and I just love seeing all the pictures she puts up of her family.

Well, I'm going to stick with three, even though I have found so many wonderful blogs over the past couple of years. Why don't you go and check out their blogs and maybe leave them a comment? I'm sure they'd love to hear from you!
My sister and I are struggling with sickness so I shall go inform the authors of the lovely blogs that they have been awarded, and then go rest for a while.


*Just because their name appears in this post does not mean that I necessarily agree with everything on their blog. It does mean that I think their blog is lovely and I enjoy reading it.